I was poking around the Series of Tubes looking for sexy ads with shrunken men in them, and instead I found something* about relationships that made me roll my eyes. and then imagine my own, as I often do. So I saved it, made a series of spectacular improvements, and now I present it to you.
- In both cases, male and female, this represents a relationship with your hand as compared with the examples that follow. Calling it “bad” is extreme, considering how often men and women engage in entanglements with their hand even if there’s someone special in their lives. A woman in that universe in which little men are available would still do better to go out and buy one at the nearest iPet store.
Of course I think my natural inclination is more than “alright”. A woman and a man, and just one of each, is great! But I’m looking at it through the glass of my fantasies. The Undersquid that lives there thinks that normal-sized men are nice, but shrinking a man very small and carrying him to her bedroom where she proceeds to manhandle him in a thousand wonderful ways is what she prefers.
What I just mentioned. This is the basis of everything that takes place in my mind. There’s one woman, and one shrunken man. He’s very special, and every day she lets him know she’s aware of how wonderful he is. Alright, plenty of times they are just writhing in the sack… but there’s always something, some little sign that shows them both there is no one else they’d prefer in bed.
Forget everything I just said. No, the above is truly the core of my thoughts, but there’s this collage I’ll be working on until the year 3009, about a woman, and a little guy, and… a man. The elements for it kinda fell into my lap. The initial image showed a woman and a man about to kiss, so I thought I’d shrink the man and have the woman bend low for a sweet kiss. She’s grabbing his shirt with a coiled fist that suddenly looked great for a handheld collage, and months ago I found a man that looks down in a grumpy, concerned manner. Somehow, a story began to unravel in my head.
The last sign shows what I think Snow White should really be about. Forget the prince. Who the hell does he think he is, arriving suddenly and taking her away from her lovers friends? When I was very small, I actually thought the “dwarfs” were little men only a few inches in height. I was about two or three years old when my mom first read me the story, and although I couldn’t vocalize it, I clearly recall thinking about these seven tiny men, and wondering how in the world Snow White could fit in their beds, even if they were all lined up together. Needless to say, I was enraged when she left with that normal-sized jerk.
*I didn’t initially spot it at deviantART, but here‘s the original image I finally found at the creator’s page.