Today I was doing things around town and thinking size thoughts with all the strength in my giant heart when I saw the car in the image above. The license plate was “TOY-####”, which instantly made me tingle with predatory hunger. The car in itself didn’t mean anything, nor did the driver, whom I never saw. What’s important is that I imagined myself in a situation where the driver of that car is someone I want to shrink, the one person I want to shrink, in fact.
I knew, at that moment, that I would have turned right, parked my car to block TOY-####’s path, and I would have shot the driver straight in the chest with my shrink ray. Would I have cared that there was traffic all around us? No. What about witnesses? Seriously, what would they say to anyone that matters?
“Detective, it’s true! There was a woman there holding something, and next I knew that guy was not standing there anymore.”
“Let me get this straight. You saw this guy, the guy in the photo, vanish into thin air?”
“You’ll be charged with obstruction of justice if you keep making up garbage like that. Now, how about the truth?”
“But I’m telling you the truth! The guy just went poof. He disappeared like I told you!”
I’d never see the inside of a prison cell. ;)
Last night I also created the Twitter poll above. Consider answering it, even though it’s silly, and I created it in a semi-unconscious cloud of sleepiness.
But back to that car… I really enjoyed feeling that way, knowing that I would not have hesitated to go after what I want, and what I need. Before anyone brings up the questionable morality of shrinking a person down to two inches in height and turning them into a companion for massive sexual needs, I’ll state that the values of good and evil don’t apply to what I would do if shrinking is invented. What I would do serves the human experience in a vital way, too important to dismiss.:D
That’s it. I’m drawing and writing more consistently now, so I’ll share some new things soon.
But also, if you don’t want someone to shrink you unexpectedly, maybe don’t announce to the world that you are a toy, using your licence plates? That person is asking for it. Just don’t look at me. I won’t be the one doing it to them. I already chose my toy.